Airless Dimension
If I could become just like the air
If I could find solace in this deceitful rest
So many things to look forward to
So many forces dragging me deeper into the abyss
To feel pain from nothingness is quite rare
To know that everyone else has done their best
Is my life just data, is there anything left to do?
Is my brain instructing me to pursue the fatal bliss?
Losing my grip, into the airless dimension I fall
Let me seek the ultimate truth, the paradoxical decision
‘Only giving up will save you,’ the voices said
‘On this day I will be reborn,’ my mind screamed
Drowning in vacuum, where the end shall enthral
Don’t listen to them, the ambivalent incision
‘A coward like you should never exist,’ the thoughts read
‘Another day is ahead of me,’ my heart dreamed
Set a date, make a plan, collect everything necessary
Send a letter, write a note, pretend to be better
Even though I need to live, the deadly prophecy persists
Eventually, however I struggle, the inevitable awakes
Grab a blade, enter the exit, abandon everything voluntary
Get a ticket, book a flight, continue to recover
Although I am so close, the barely functioning self resists
After all, I am still here- and the unknown awaits.
